“Forgiveness is not always easy. At times, it feels more painful than the wound we suffered, to forgive the one that inflicted it. And yet, there is no peace without forgiveness.”
Forgiveness plays a very significant role in your life, especially within your closest and intimate relationships. There are lots of people out there who choose to hold onto the bitterness, pain and resentment, but they don’t realize that a lack of forgiveness actually forms the heart of numerous problems. Choosing not to forgive will make you feel like you are carrying a heavy burden and you will not be able to move forward. It also causes stress and affects your health because your blood pressure rises and so does your heart rate when you think about those who have transgressed against you. Your cardiovascular system and immune system are also stressed.
You need to realize that the past is the past and you can’t undo it. Forgiveness can offer you peace of mind and freedom; when you learn to let it go, you are released from your prison and this can give you happiness. Your well-being and health are closely connected to your happiness and practicing forgiveness can contribute significantly to them. The problem is that it isn’t easy for people to forgive and move on because they may not know how. Here are some steps that can help you in the process:
- Consider forgiveness a gift for you and not for others
One of the reasons why you choose to hang on to a grievance is because you believe that forgiving will let the other person off the hook. Actually, this isn’t about the other person at all. When you forgive, you can stop suffering and get a chance to find peace and closure. When you hold onto a grievance, you will suffer from stress, sleepless nights and other unhealthy conditions. You will be able to live a happier life when you think of forgiveness as a gift to you.
- Stop ruminating on negative emotions
It will be unproductive and a waste of time to go over the same negative feelings over and over again. Express your feelings to the relevant person. Articulating your feelings will help you in releasing your grudge and grievances along with negative feelings.
- Try to empathize with the other person
This doesn’t make what the other person did acceptable. But, you still need to think of why they did it. Perhaps they were going through some rough patches and you just got caught in the blast. Maybe the person doesn’t know any better and they are doing what they think is best. Practicing empathy makes you human and it is also healing.
- Be grateful for what you have learnt
Every experience in life, both good and bad, teach us something valuable. Think of these experiences or people as assignments. When you aren’t able to forgive easily, you can think of what you have learnt because it was just a lesson to help you in the future and you can also read some forgiveness quotes to inspire you. Be grateful that you have the opportunity of learning and growing.
As long as you follow these tips, you will be able to forgive and live a happier life.